A Cherished Muslimah respects herself, knowing that by doing this, she inspires respect from others. She protects her energy levels and takes the initiative to get her needs met in a calm, loving and queenly manner.
By respecting herself she teaches others how to treat her, but also teaches them how to respect themselves. She knows that by upholding her values she can be the Cherished Muslimah that she was created to be. She embraces her uniqueness and uses her uniqueness to create her own unique relationship with her creator
A Cherished Muslimah is always connected to Allah, and she draws from His strength and power to ensure that her boundaries are respected.
She knows that He is the one who gives honour and is just towards everyone, and so she doesn’t hesitate to insist that she is respected and treated fairly. She knows that He has her back, and is looking out for her, and from this place of confidence she upholds her values with conviction.
This October cultivate the trait of self-respect by submitting to Allah’s names of justice and power – His beautiful attributes of being fair and giving everyone their rights – you included!
Allah is the giver of honour – and so call upon Him to give you honour. By respecting yourself, you will increase in respect in the eyes of others.
Allah is, Al-Adl – He is just in rulings and proportions. A Cherished Muslimah always strives to just and respectful towards others, and so it is only fair to expect that from others. Submit to the one who is just in rulings and proportions by establishing justice for yourself and others, cultivating a culture in your home where everyone is fair to one another.
Al Hafidh is the preserver and protector. Call upon Him from protection when you want to establish your boundaries.
Allah is Al-Wakil, the one who takes responsibility for you. It can be uncomfortable putting down boundaries, as often it can cause others to be upset with us. Take heart, the uncomfortable feelings that initially come from setting down boundaries and soon replaced with feelings of liberation and peace. Let the one who takes responsibility for you suffice you, as you take responsibility for yourself.
Al-Wali stands for the believer. When upholding your values and taking the initiative to get your needs met, allow yourself to be supported and strengthened by calling upon the one who will stand for the believer, to stand up for you.
Have healthy, loving boundaries by submitting to Al-Muntaqim – the one who doesn’t take revenge for Himself. A life without boundaries can lead to resentment and unhealthy arguments. Instead of arguing about why your boundaries are not being met, and start to articulate them clearly.
Submit to Al-Muqsit, the one who is just in equity and fairness, by ensuring justice for yourself. We can often put ourselves last and sacrifice to the point of sickness. Remember – your body also has rights, so ensure you look after it.
Spend in Allah’s cause: do not contribute to your destruction with your own hands, but do good, for God loves those who do good.
Al Baqarah (2:195)
Know that you have the protection of Al-Mani, the one who creates causes for protection. Let this strengthen you when you create your own protecting boundaries.
Call upon Al Jabbar, the one who compels others to submit. He is the one who breaks us in order to make us. It is often an experience of negative emotions or experiences that cause us to realise that we are lacking boundaries in our life. Welcome these experiences and realisations into your life, as you establish boundaries that heal a part of you that was not tended to in the past.
Allah is Al-Qahar, the oppressor, dominator of enemies. Call upon Him to protect you from being overpowered by others or your own self.
Al-Qawi is the strong, perfect power. Call upon Him to empower you as you establish your boundaries.
Call upon the firm, intensified strength to make you firm in your resolve as you insist on what is important to you. Having self-respect is not a one-time process, they are something that needs to be consistently upheld, just like the fences in your garden are required all the time, and need regular maintenance.
A Cherished Muslimah submits to Allah’s justice and power and through this submission she is also strengthened. She knows that by upholding her values and by ensuring her needs are met, she is worshipping Allah, and so she established boundaries purposefully. Knowing it is not always an easy process, she does it prayerfully, calling upon The Power to give her power. Calling on The Just when establishes justice for herself.